John Edwards, Tiger Woods, and Me

I’ve just got to get something off my chest…

John Edwards is complete scum.
(So is Tiger Woods.)
And Eliot Spitzer.
And Bill Clinton.

Look, before I go any further, I realize that there’s always “behind the scenes” stuff that we as the gawking American public don’t know about when it comes to politicians and celebs who have affairs. (Hell, does anyone really not understand why Bill would look elsewhere for his lovin’?) However what bothers me most is that these people flat out LIE once they’re caught. Not only did they cheat on their wives (and thereby screwing up their kids), but then when they were caught, they lied like it was life or death. Billy boy even cost the American public financially when he lied, as there was was actually an investigation and trial. The man swore under oath that he was innocent, which was a lie. And he was allowed to remain PoTUS and is still hailed by many to this day. Seriously?!

With the exception of Tiger Woods, the other three men I named up there (yes, there are surely thousands more) have this public persona where they’re to be held responsible to the public for some pretty major stuff. Bill Clinton was getting his weenie wet INSIDE the Oval Office. John Edwards was running for president, and cheated on his cancer-fighting wife. Eliot Spitzer was using paid staff to guard the doors of his hotel rooms where he paid over $400 an hour to do things that are illegal in some states to a hooker.

So not only have these men been unfaithful to the women who stood by them while they rose up in the political ranks, the women who trusted them, the women who carried and cared for their children, but then they lied about it.

I personally have three rules when I’m in a relationship: Don’t cheat on me, don’t lie to me, and don’t get abusive in any way, shape, or form. Outside of those three things, I can honestly probably forgive anything. (So yeah, Chris Brown wouldn’t have made it very far with me either, and likely would’ve suffered some major infliction of pain to his “manhood” had he tried striking me.)

I give Tiger’s wife (and Rihanna) some credit for booting him out and taking off her ring. Though the rumor mill today says that he’s in a sex addict’s rehab somewhere in the middle of nowhere, and that she happens to be in the same town. Who knows, but at least she’s putting her foot down. Elizabeth Edwards, though? The woman’s been battling cancer for what, 5+ years now? I mean, we’re not talking having a sketchy looking mole removed, this woman’s gone through the wringer and all the while, hubby’s bonking some indie documentary film maker. Today the “breaking news” (of which the public already was aware of) is that he lied before, and he knows that the child this homewrecker gave birth to is his. (Also that he had asked one of his staffers to pay off a doctor to fake a paternity test, and to steal a diaper so he could privately conduct one to tell for sure if the baby was his. Nice guy who was almost elected President, eh?) And where is Mrs. Edwards in all of this? Standing by her man. WTF?!

Guess what ladies? Standing by a cheating man doesn’t do anyone any good. It lets him know that there’s literally nothing he could do to make you stop wanting him. It tells young women that it’s okay to be cheated on, and that you should forgive him for his indiscretions. It shows that as a young man, you can cheat, get caught, lie, and still keep a good woman at home.

Now, before you go claiming that I’m jaded, that I’m not looking at cheating women because I’m a woman, or that I’m being too harsh – take note of something… I’m 32 years old, and have NEVER cheated. I’ve never even thought of it. My father was always faithful to my mother. But I happen to know a LOT of men (I belong to a volunteer fire department, for one thing), and I can honestly say that very few of them have the ability or desire to be faithful.

I do know a few guys who I believe are faithful, sure. It’s less than maybe 5% of the total number of men I know well enough to make that call, but they do exist. They’re honestly the only reason I haven’t given up entirely on the idea of marriage. But the other 95% are one of the reasons I’ve made it into my 30’s without having ever been married. That bothers me. It bothers me that we’re living in a world where relationships are so dispensable. So un-important to people. Celebs get married on a gust of wind and get divorced on the next one. “Real” people spend years in relationships and then all of the sudden, seemingly out of nowhere, one of them decides they’ve found someone “better”. Sometimes they respect the other person enough to leave first, but usually not.

I know that making a statement about “the old days” where marriages lasted would be on the verge of naive. I know that back then, husbands “worked late” and cheated with secretaries while wives stayed at home cooking and cleaning. I know that wives would sleep with the Maytag man when he showed up, because hubby was off earning the bread and wouldn’t be home for hours. I know that these things haven’t changed, however I do think they’ve become more accepted, and that’s so wrong to me.

What’s to blame for this sex-addicted population? Why are wives not giving it up to satisfy their husbands, or are they? Is one woman truly ever enough for a man, or do we believe the cheater’s broken record stating that “spreading the seed” is a primal instinct? There are plenty of animals which “mate for life”, so why are there so many humans who just simply can’t? Afterall, we’re the species with advanced brain power, and the ability to make conscious decisions based on more than hormones.

I may just be frustrated this morning. The news programs showed the John Edwards and Tiger Woods sex rehab stories virtually back-to-back, and I’ve been dealing with my own frustrations over relationships (actually, my lack thereof) and maybe all of this just touched a nerve with me because my ex was a cheater. In any event, to say I’m disgusted with all of it is an understatement.

Okay, I’m off to spend the day working now. I don’t need to devote much more attention at all to lying, cheating scum. (So for the record, major news networks – stop shoving it down my throat. Kthxbai.)

Related articles elsewhere on the web:

• High Infidelity (washingtonmonthly.com)
• National Post editorial board: Tiger’s tale proves morals still matter (network.nationalpost.com)
• Lack of shame is name of the game (timesunion.com)
• Are We Born to Cheat? Tempers Rise in White-Hot Debate (abcnews.go.com)